Letter of Wishes

What is a letter of wishes?

A letter of wishes is an informal document that sits alongside your will. It provides additional guidance to your executors and trustees about how you'd like your estate to be handled — but unlike your will, it's not legally binding.

Think of it as a personal note to the people carrying out your wishes, filling in the details that a formal will can't easily cover.

Why write a letter of wishes?

A will is a legal document with strict formal requirements. It's necessarily quite dry and technical. A letter of wishes gives you space to:

• Explain your reasoning — why you've left more to one child than another, or why you've excluded someone
• Guide your trustees — if your will includes a discretionary trust, your letter can indicate how you'd like the funds distributed
• Record funeral wishes — burial or cremation, type of service, specific requests
• Distribute personal items — who should get the family photos, your mother's ring, your record collection
• Share important information — passwords, account details, location of important documents
• Express personal messages — things you want your family to know

What to include

Guidance for trustees

If your will creates any trusts (such as for children or a vulnerable beneficiary), your letter of wishes can guide the trustees on:

• When to release funds
• How to balance competing needs
• Your priorities for the beneficiaries

Distribution of personal items

Your will might say "I leave my personal possessions to my children equally," but that doesn't say who gets the piano and who gets the paintings. A letter of wishes can go item by item.

Funeral preferences

• Burial or cremation
• Religious or secular service
• Music, readings, or poems
• Where to scatter ashes
• Organ donation preferences

Practical information

• Location of your will and other important documents
• Bank account details and financial adviser contacts
• Digital account passwords or password manager details
• Insurance policy numbers

Is it legally binding?

No. A letter of wishes is not a legal document and cannot override your will. Your executors and trustees are expected to consider it seriously, but they're not obliged to follow it.

This is actually an advantage: it means you can update your letter of wishes at any time, without the formality of changing your will. No witnesses are needed.

Tips for writing one

• Keep it separate from your will — store it alongside but not attached to your will
• Date it — so your executors know it's current
• Write clearly — be specific about what you want
• Update it regularly — circumstances change
• Tell your executors it exists — there's no point writing one if nobody knows about it

Who should have a letter of wishes?

Almost everyone benefits from writing one, but it's particularly useful if:

• Your will includes discretionary trusts
• You have many personal possessions to distribute
• You want to explain the reasoning behind your will
• You have strong funeral preferences
• You want to leave personal messages for your family

A letter of wishes takes the pressure off your executors and gives your family a clearer picture of what you wanted. It's a thoughtful addition to any estate plan.